If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
