I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize