The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
