Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
