why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Randomize