Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
