pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I can text with my tongue
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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