Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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