ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
