Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Randomize