David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.