Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
It's shark week go big or go home
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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