Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
