just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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