im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
