glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
