i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize