it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize