youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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