Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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