i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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