Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
