No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
