And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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