hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
