More tranny stories later!
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
