well I can't set my house on fire every night
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize