I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
so let's talk penis.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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