I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
