I wish I could teleport
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
