Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
