i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
