every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize