Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We have started to decorate penises.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
