Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  Why were you high on a thursday?

  (1-650): View more from California

  today's a wednesday

  (650): View more from California

  I asked first.

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  (650): Why were you high on a thursday? (1-650): today's a wednesday (650): I asked first. http://tfl.nu/enxr
  Replies (9) Good night (2602) Bad night (642)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  There is no way he is gay with that hair.

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  (617): There is no way he is gay with that hair. http://tfl.nu/3fbq
  Replies (7) Good night (3050) Bad night (803)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license

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  (813): i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license http://tfl.nu/t0ir
  Replies (13) Good night (5595) Bad night (704)
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  (650): View more from California

  How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?

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  (650): How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list? http://tfl.nu/v2ct
  Replies (28) Good night (1286) Bad night (4836)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain

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  (612): i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain http://tfl.nu/an1d
  Replies (3) Good night (3900) Bad night (1058)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.

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  (352): I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern. http://tfl.nu/54kf
  Replies (16) Good night (4021) Bad night (1064)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.

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  (732): This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms. http://tfl.nu/i073
  Replies (3) Good night (1664) Bad night (871)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?

  (309): View more from Illinois

  No idea. And yes be here at 4

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  (801): Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding? (309): No idea. And yes be here at 4 http://tfl.nu/o72l
  Replies (10) Good night (2272) Bad night (722)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.

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  (989): It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks. http://tfl.nu/f9iv
  Replies (12) Good night (1121) Bad night (721)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.

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  (603): Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up. http://tfl.nu/6dgm
  Replies (2) Good night (911) Bad night (860)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you

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  (512): Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you http://tfl.nu/d8vu
  Replies (4) Good night (936) Bad night (465)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer

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  (214): Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer http://tfl.nu/w9ex
  Replies (3) Good night (632) Bad night (549)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?

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  (305): He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right? http://tfl.nu/9ey8
  Replies (5) Good night (981) Bad night (801)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.

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  (727): We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED. (1-727): I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information. http://tfl.nu/ag5b
  Replies (5) Good night (971) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.

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  (914): You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it. http://tfl.nu/4ym6
  Replies (1) Good night (948) Bad night (456)

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