Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance. http://tfl.nu/qptg
  Replies (11) Good night (3227) Bad night (791)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina http://tfl.nu/02ir
  Replies (35) Good night (773) Bad night (4700)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real. http://tfl.nu/u784
  Replies (20) Good night (781) Bad night (3204)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome. http://tfl.nu/dlib
  Replies (23) Good night (1681) Bad night (3318)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart http://tfl.nu/al7w
  Replies (182) Good night (52616) Bad night (2243)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  and technically it was a rebound

  (407): View more from Florida

  so lol

  (770): View more from Georgia

  and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): and technically it was a rebound (407): so lol (770): and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game http://tfl.nu/lfzh
  Replies (15) Good night (781) Bad night (2479)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here http://tfl.nu/3q8i
  Replies (36) Good night (1017) Bad night (6245)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Are we going out tonight?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  My conscience says no but my vag says yes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Are we going out tonight? (414): My conscience says no but my vag says yes http://tfl.nu/5n9j
  Replies (7) Good night (3022) Bad night (1133)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (575): I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend. http://tfl.nu/kkwb
  Replies (3) Good night (731) Bad night (1456)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. http://tfl.nu/n4ph
  Replies (6) Good night (909) Bad night (1658)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me. http://tfl.nu/5yy8
  Replies (3) Good night (637) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt. http://tfl.nu/hm2f
  Replies (3) Good night (882) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely http://tfl.nu/0b34
  Replies (6) Good night (364) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): I think my AA sponsor just booty called me. http://tfl.nu/z94l
  Replies (3) Good night (636) Bad night (414)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk http://tfl.nu/beqp
  Replies (1) Good night (459) Bad night (202)

Randomize