Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
