These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
