Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Randomize