I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
