I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize