You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
