I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
