i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
How naked do you want me to be?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize