Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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