I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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