you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
