Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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