He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
