It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
