I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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